Monday, September 7, 2009

Dampa? Dampa? She can't say Granpa

I hear my name dozens of times a day...

Dampa? Dampa?
Daammpa!

My precious little 17 month old granddaughter is a joy to spend a day with.
And I get to spend EVERY day with her.

I'm her live-in full time baby sitter and I'm lovin life right now. My Dad, when he was still alive, was known to my kids as Grandpa, so at first I wanted to be called "Grand Daddy" by my second tier off spring. That caused a problem of jealousy with my son in law, my grandbaby could be heard calling ME daddy. The fact that I spend more time with her than any other human being, including her parents made this natural... but depending on your perspective not understandable.

Extended Family
I never had extended family, when I was in my 20's I had to figure stuff out for myself and pay any consequences for my learning curve, fully aware of the fact that my family had to pay for any mistakes I made, not me.

I solved this conundrum by having my grandbaby call me GranPA. Which at this juncture comes out as Dampa, and I'm fine with that.


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I found this interesting article about children and nutrition on Hubpages:

f your child seems to be bored, angry, irritable, hostile and/or sad they may need psychological help but they may also benefit enormously from some biochemical help. It is this latter route we will consider here. The child who is well nourished will not only have an improved mood but they will also have the energy to cope with the ups and downs of life.

A British scientist, Bernard Gesch, from Oxford, has clearly demonstrated the link between diet and behavior. In a ground-breaking study which involved 231 male prisoners in one of the UK's maximum security prisons, half were given a daily multi-vitamin pill and the other half a placebo. The results which are published in the British Journal of Psychiatry show an amazing 35 % decrease in acts of aggression from the prisoners eating the multi-vitamin. There was no change in the behavior of the prisoners on the placebo. Once the study was over and the vitamins stopped the violent and aggressive behavior increased again.

The common imbalances that children can suffer from which will affect behavior and mood include the following:

Blood sugar imbalances
Deficiencies of nutrients
Allergies and sensitivities
Deficiencies of tryptophan and tyrosine which are precursors of neurotransmitters (but more on those later).
Blood sugar imbalances are an easy thing for a parent to control. This is what my son suffers from and once he has something to eat he is a different child. The best way of avoiding these imbalances is by ensuring your child has a proper breakfast of unprocessed food and doesn't go too long without food. Sugary cereals may not be the best breakfast food.
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Sunday, August 30, 2009

Parenting Trends

Non medical remedies making a comeback?

Chicken soup is so in!

Due to new warnings about the dangers of using cough and cold medicines on kids, parents will be employing more traditional techniques to soothe their sick tots. "Parents are going back to basics," says Jennifer Shu, MD, who recommends trying nasal washes and chicken soup, which eases inflammation, to help kids feel better (she also loves Breath Right strips for her own 8-year-old son). "Medicine never sped up the healing," she says, "It only provided relief." More natural approaches are increasingly seen as the safest route, considering medicinal overdoses send an average of 7,000 kids to the ER every year. You can't overdose on soup.

Trend Tip: Next time your child has a cold, Dr. Shu suggests trying a nasal wash like NeilMed Sinus Rinse, which can help her blow out some congestion (you can also suck it out with an aspirator if your kid's too young to blow her nose). Or make a saline solution at home with 1/4 teaspoon of salt in 1 cup of warm water. If your little one is eating solids, try giving her some chicken soup or broth to boost the immune system and keep her hydrated. At night, place a Breathe-Right strip on her nose to help her breathe. Studies also show honey can soothe a cough if your child is older than 1.


Making the change from diapers to pull-ups
From Mamasource.com

From:Holly BDate:Tue. Aug. 25, 2009
Just getting advice on when and how to get my son out of pull-up's at nightime. He's been potty trained for a year (he's 3 1/2) but still wakes up a little bit wet most days...I try not to give alot of fluids after 7'ish and he goes potty before bedtime, usually, but he is just a little wet when he wakes up. Also, i'm trying to tell him it's ok to get up and go potty if he needs to....but he's such a sound sleeper, i don't think that will work either. Is he still too young? Should i wait until he's dry most days? He has good control during the day and even at naptime, no accidents at all! Any advice would be appreciated...Thanks! holly

A little about me:

Im a 34 year old working mom of an almost 3 1/2 yr old boy.(whew!) Motherhood is the best ride of my life! My husband and I bought a house and are hoping to grow our family soon.....but i'm still learning....parenting is tough! I always feel i'm not doing stuff right....but i learn more every day!

Respond to Holly on Mommasource.com here


As a Grandpa who never had the experience of extended family I'm discovering stuff I wasn't prepared for. Jealousy for one, my counterpart on the father's side of the family views me as competition?

And I'm learning to keep certain things to myself:
I spend more time with my granddaughter than any other human being, including her Mommie and Daddy... I was the first one to see her stand on her own, she balanced herself upright with her little hands hovering over my knees.

I was the first person to see her take her first step.
I bragged about it (bragging is a codependent trait ) Well neither daughter or her husband were very pleased about that. I need to learn to keep that sort of thing under my hat.

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Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Quick Fix for Discipline Problems

The 5-Second Discipline Fix

If you want your kid to wash his hands, pick up his trains, or give his sister's tiara back, don't ask -- tell.
The Friendly Approach to Discipline

Let's face it: If you had a dollar for every time you wanted your child to do something, paying the bills would be painless. You need him to listen up so you can make it through the day -- and keep your home from becoming a total disaster zone. Yet, like most parents, you probably don't want to be a nag (or a drill sergeant), so you constantly ask your child to cooperate. You figure he'll be more likely to pick up his towel off the bathroom floor or sit down at the dinner table if you come across as friendly rather than bossy. After all, you'll catch more flies with honey, right?

It seems like a reasonable approach, especially since that's the way that we typically talk to adults. "Being polite in our society requires making indirect requests, such as 'Can you pass the salt?'" explains developmental psychologist Linda Acredolo, PhD, a Parents advisor and coauthor of Baby Hearts. "If you interpret this question literally -- as young children always do -- it isn't actually a request for salt, it's a question of whether or not the person is capable of passing the salt." (Of course, you'd never expect your dinner companion to simply answer, "Yes.") So when you ask your child, "Would you like to take a bath now?" he thinks that you're actually offering him the opportunity to say no -- even though you really meant it as a polite way to make a direct command. The result? "You get upset and your child gets upset -- and confused," says Dr. Acredolo.



Helmet or No Helmet on a tricycle?


My Husband and I differ on this issue. - Shari M
Our son just turned 4 and suddenly took an interest in his tricycle. It's an antique one (circa 1948) that my Dad refurbished that all us kids used and then all the grandkids. It is a little tall and somewhat "tippier" than a modern tricycle that has a lower center of gravity. My husband was mad when I asked him if he'd put a helmet on him when our son rode it all the way down to and around the park. He thought I was insane for suggesting it "Cos a tricycle doesn't go very fast" I said it isn't about fast - it's about the distance from sitting on the thing to the ground which if you fall wrong he can crack his head on the concrete which is the whole point of a helmet. I'm a little mad that he is making this decision cos it would seem "not tough" or "uncool" for his BOY on a tricycle. What do you ladies think? FYI: He doesn't have a problem with helmets on bicycles.
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A little about me: I'm 47 and a SAHM. My only child is a 4 yr old joyful little boy!! It took me a long time to have this baby and I stayed at home so I wouldn't miss one second with him. I'm working on several creative business ideas so I can have a business at home and stay a Full Time Mom - even when he is in school!

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Friday, June 19, 2009

SAHGD -Stay At Home Grand Dad

Stay at Home Grand Daddy


In another life I run an internet marketing business, this is what allows me to be the a full time day care for my Grand Daughter. I watch my Grandbaby during the day and do my local search engine consulting business at night. In posting to various online forums I've seen this abreviation: SAHM which means "Stay At Home Mom"

...It just occured to me that I'm a Stay At Home Granddad.

Here's an article from a child care blog I follow:


3 Year Old acting out - I had a miscarriage about 2 weeks ago, and it has been very hard on me physically (I tried the pills, didn't work, ended up in hospital for a D&C), so I have not been able to play as much with my son. He goes to daycare full-time, and has been getting into trouble almost 3 times a week the last two weeks. He has been hitting, biting, throwing food, etc. He has never had any behavior issues until now. I know that it is the miscarriage and my health that is affecting him. My question is, how do we fix this? His teachers know what is going on and are being lenient with him, but this bad behavior is getting out of control! We do take things away when he is bad, such as no TV on the days he gets in trouble, or we take away a favorite toy and give it back when he has a great day. I am feeling better and returned to work today, so I know that will help him, but what do we do? Thank you in advance for your advice!
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A little about me: I have a three year old son who keeps me on my toes! My husband and I are both in the Navy and stay very busy between my son and two great danes! I also love to scrapbook and recently became a consultant for Close To My Heart.

Imagination of my child
I have been having some really large concerns in regards to my 5 year old son. Let me start by saying he has a very strict education regimen and cartoons, other than educational are pretty much a no in my house. However, I do allow him to watch some Disney shows. His TV time a day is limited to about 1.5 hrs.

He is a very intelligent (he reads and makes good grades), active and imaginative child that comes from to parents that are extremely self assured and thought he instilled those same values in him as far as self esteem. He on the other hand doubts his intelligences and presence.

I do not know if I am worrying about something simple but it seems to me that he masks himself behind character reenactments. His imagination takes him to other levels. Especially around new people or when he fears or when he is in shy mode. He is obsessed with any character that he finds interesting. He learns about these characters through other kids at school.

He often ignores the fact that he is a little boy. He greets people in monster voices and ECT... I am not sure what to do but his teacher and I are both concerned. Per her he chooses not to interact in regular conversations with other children and when he does, its way off base and totally of the wall.

I am really concerned about him. He also chooses to play with children that are a year or two younger than him rather than other five year olds. I am not sure what is going on. Does anyone have any suggestions or ideas on what is going on?

A little about me: working married mother of one child

read more...

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Sunday, May 31, 2009

Reactive VS Proactive----Parents on the Edge

What is it that makes too many parents more reactive than proactive when it comes to child safety? Are we becoming too complacent in our present day lifestyle securities? As the news on a daily basis recounts the accidental death of children under five years old, I can't help but wonder; how can this be? Where were the parents of this child? What could they be doing that was more important than a child's safety? Of course, we all know that accidents happen and not all accidents can be avoided. But all too often the causes of these accidental deaths of very young children are all too often glaring 20/20 hindsight. Why do parents not spend a little extra time saying, "Let's do this" rather than saying, "Why didn't I.?"

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A crib baby whose crib is placed too close to a window blind tangles its head in the blind cord and is strangled. A four-year-old squeezes through the fifth story balcony railings of a prominent hotel and falls to his death. A grandmother sends her two-year-old grandson outside to play with his father and grandfather. She shouts out the back door that the baby is coming out, but doesn't realize no one heard. The baby was found an hour later in the bottom of the above ground swimming pool. A four-year-old girl playing around her parent's treadmill has strangled on the dangling treadmill cord. And now, more recently, a two-year-old girl has died after swallowing a tiny button' battery that has destroyed her esophagus. As heartbreaking and unpleasant as these statistics are to read and hear about, we all know that all of these deaths could have been prevented.

No matter how many times you purchase an article with warnings of KEEP OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN and bring it home; there is always the one time that the warning goes unnoticed, ignored, or maybe it isn't there at all, because it is something that no one thought could be a hazard-until it's too late. Most manufacturers, especially of children's toys try to think proactively-they have a lot to lose. Now it is time that parents begin to think proactively-they have even more to lose.

My love of children and babies has prompted me to ask-no plead, beg-parents and grandparents to please become proactive in your baby's safety. Look for the obvious safety hazards, and then look again and again for the not so obvious. Don't leave anything to chance. Know where your child is at all times and the very young should be within view or checked on more often than you think necessary. Nothing, absolutely nothing can replace a lost child!

Call me obsessive, but when SIDS became a household word, my babies slept between my husband and myself until they were well past the age of incidence. And we each took turns placing our hands on our babies back through out the night just to check for breathing. We now do the same with our grandbabies, when they spend the night. I'm sure DR. SPOCK' would roll over in his grave if he knew that I read his book thoroughly with my first baby, then tossed it in the trashcan and raised my children my way.

When a parent loses a baby, especially through accidental death, the devastation can be two-fold. A baby's death can put the parent or parents on the edge, or worse, over the edge. Then not only is the child lost but a spouse or parent of other siblings can be lost as well. Don't let your baby become a statistic, don't let your family suffer the unthinkable-become that Proactive Parent and be there for your children.


About the Author

Sandra E. Graham

Sandra graduated from Egypt High School in Egypt, Arkansas in 1965. Continuing her education by attending Eastfield College in Mesquite, Texas; Crowley’s Ridge Community College; Mississippi Community College; and finally back home to Arkansas State University in Jonesboro, Arkansas. Visit her website at http://www.sandragraham-articles-books.com to see her newest publications. Sandra's books Amos Jakey and Nicolina are historical adventure books published by American Book publishing and may be purchased through pdbookstore.com, Amazon, Books in Print, Barnes and Noble, and Baker & Taylor. She also writes free book reviews for authors through Book Pleasures.

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Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Seasonal Allergies


Sesonal Allergies in 13 month old? - Aleya A

Hi Moms,

I have a 13 month old who has had eczema almost since he was born.I was told by his pediatrician to look out for food or seasonal allergies. So far I haven't been able to identify any food allergies but last week he started having a runny nose, wet cough, and swollen eyes. I've heard it's early for seasonal allergies but I have friends who are already dealing with symptoms.

Does this sound like seasonal allergies to you? Also, is he too young to be tested for allergies? Lastly, if it is seasonal allergies, what can I do to give him some relief?

A little about me: I'm a 32 yo, full-time undergrad and single mom to a beautiful 13 month old boy.

Respond


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Help getting my 2.5 year old to sleep in a "big boy" bed - M H

I was wondering if anyone had advise on getting my 2.5 y.o. son to stay in his bed. We had to transition to a toddler bed because he started climbing out of his crib. I feel like we've tried everything. We've tried telling him to stay, picking him up and laying him back in bed without saying anything to him, preparing him before hand by talking to him, rubbing his back, rewards, consequences, the list goes on. When I tried this for the 1st time 6 months ago we also tried putting a gate in the doorway, but he would empty all of his clothes from his drawers into the hallway. We originally tried it b/c we had another baby coming. We started the transition 3-4 months before the new baby was due. It didn't work after trying for 6 weeks, so we went back to the crib. He did GREAT when he was back in the crib, but now he started climbing out and hurting himself. So, the toddler bed is the way we need to go for now. BTW, once he fall asleep he stays there until morning. Also, I know some people "lock them in" by putting a child-proof knob on the door. If nothing else works I might be willing to try this, but I would REALLY rather not. Any help would be appreciated!!!

Respond


Question on choice of diapers - Sharon A

hello there . I'm planning to use non-disposable diapers my second time around. Wanted to get advice and experience from moms who use the following systems:
Pre-folded cloth diapers and covers.
"one-size" pocket diapers that adjusts with baby.
If you use them full time, how many do you have to keep ahead of the laundry pile? Are they convenient to use? Any problems? Suggestions?
My baby "shower" for #2 will likely be a Diaper Party where we ask everyone to contribute to the cause of purchasing the diapers upfront. I hope to save much $$ and waste this way. I just need to select which system to use, and I've narrowed it down to the choices above.
Thanks!!

Respond


Strep throat, fever and continuing HEADACHES in my 4 year old -- ADVICE? - Vicki D

My son was diagnosed with strep throat on Friday. He never complained of a sore throat, but has complained of headaches for about a month. He had a 101 fever on Friday, then 103.8 last night and I called the doctor. She said that his fever should be gone 72 hours after starting the antibiotics, so we are waiting til this afternoon to see how he is. I was concerned about meningitis, but immediately she said no. He was happy, eating and playing yesterday morning, then only wanted to lay down the rest of the day, saying his head hurt. The doctor said headaches are a sympton of strep, but I was surprised he had strep when he never said his throat hurt. Anyway, just would like to hear anyone's advice on strep or headaches.... any guidance would be appreciated!

A little about me: Was a SAHM for 4 years, just went to work Full time two months ago. I am a BOYS MOM -- 3 boys ages 4, 3, 2. Play play play is the word of every day!!




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Monday, March 30, 2009

Why Toddlers Don't Do What They're Told

Do What You Are Told

By LiveScience Staff

Are you listening to me? 
Didn't I just tell you to get your coat? 
Helloooo! It's cold out there...

So goes many a conversation between parent and toddler. It seems everything you tell them either falls on deaf ears or goes in one ear and out the other. But that's not how it works.
Toddlers listen, they just store the information for later use, a new study finds.

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"I went into this study expecting a completely different set of findings," said psychology professor Yuko Munakata at the University of Colorado at Boulder. "There is a lot of work in the field of cognitive development that focuses on how kids are basically little versions of adults trying to do the same things adults do, but they're just not as good at it yet. What we show here is they are doing something completely different."

Munakata and colleagues used a computer game and a setup that measures the diameter of the pupil of the eye to determine the mental effort of the child to study the cognitive abilities of 3-and-a-half-year-olds and 8-year-olds.

The game involved teaching children simple rules about two cartoon characters — Blue from Blue's Clues and SpongeBob SquarePants — and their preferences for different objects. The children were told that Blue likes watermelon, so they were to press the happy face on the computer screen only when they saw Blue followed by a watermelon. When SpongeBob appeared, they were to press the sad face on the screen.

"The older kids found this sequence easy, because they can anticipate the answer before the object appears," said doctoral student Christopher Chatham, who participated in the study. "But preschoolers fail to anticipate in this way. Instead, they slow down and exert mental effort after being presented with the watermelon, as if they're thinking back to the character they had seen only after the fact."

The pupil measurements showed that 3-year-olds neither plan for the future nor live completely in the present. Instead, they call up the past as they need it.

"For example, let's say it's cold outside and you tell your 3-year-old to go get his jacket out of his bedroom and get ready to go outside," Chatham explained. "You might expect the child to plan for the future, think 'OK it's cold outside so the jacket will keep me warm.' But what we suggest is that this isn't what goes on in a 3-year-old's brain. Rather, they run outside, discover that it is cold, and then retrieve the memory of where their jacket is, and then they go get it."

The findings are detailed this week in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.

Munakata figures the results might help with real situations.

"If you just repeat something again and again that requires your young child to prepare for something in advance, that is not likely to be effective," Munakata said. "What would be more effective would be to somehow try to trigger this reactive function. So don't do something that requires them to plan ahead in their mind, but rather try to highlight the conflict that they are going to face. Perhaps you could say something like 'I know you don't want to take your coat now, but when you're standing in the yard shivering later, remember that you can get your coat from your bedroom."

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